Top of the evening everyone.
There has been much ado over the last several years about the impending zombie apocalypse. We are duly concerned here at the Gorman residence. I purchased a few extra cans of tuna fish. Not since the Y2K hysteria have we had such a reaction. When that was in process, again, Jennifer and I were prepared. Not only did we have extra tuna. We also filled the gas tank. We thought about maxing out on our credit cards, hoping that the bill would go 'poof' on January 1st, but decided that it could be a bad idea if nothing happened.
Anyway, there has been a significant first step in preventing the zombie apocalypse. This significant step was taken in Honolulu. What was it? I am glad that you asked.
The City of Honolulu has banned what has come to be know as 'zombie walking.' For those of you who do not know, zombie walking is when a person crosses the street while looking at a cell phone. It is dangerous.
Now, with this law, the planners of the zombie apocalypse will have to think twice before invading Oahu. It will be very difficult for the zombies to gain control of the city when zombies are not allowed in the crosswalks. Jaywalking has already been forbidden. We can only hope that other municipalities will make similar laws. This is not just about pedestrian safety in Waikiki. It is a strategic step for the safety of humanity.
Ladies and gentlemen, I bid you good evening, and remind you all to look both ways before crossing the street. This is a good law that was passed in Honolulu.