Sunday, October 29, 2017

Strategic Steps in Preventing the Zombie Apocalypse...

Top of the evening everyone.

There has been much ado over the last several years about the impending zombie apocalypse.  We are duly concerned here at the Gorman residence.  I purchased a few extra cans of tuna fish.  Not since the Y2K hysteria have we had such a reaction.  When that was in process, again, Jennifer and I were prepared.  Not only did we have extra tuna.  We also filled the gas tank.  We thought about maxing out on our credit cards, hoping that the bill would go 'poof' on January 1st, but decided that it could be a bad idea if nothing happened.

Anyway, there has been a significant first step in preventing the zombie apocalypse.  This significant step was taken in Honolulu.  What was it?  I am glad that you asked.

The City of Honolulu has banned what has come to be know as 'zombie walking.'  For those of you who do not know, zombie walking is when a person crosses the street while looking at a cell phone.  It is dangerous.

Now, with this law, the planners of the zombie apocalypse will have to think twice before invading Oahu.  It will be very difficult for the zombies to gain control of the city when zombies are not allowed in the crosswalks.  Jaywalking has already been forbidden.  We can only hope that other municipalities will make similar laws.  This is not just about pedestrian safety in Waikiki.  It is a strategic step for the safety of humanity.

Ladies and gentlemen, I bid you good evening, and remind you all to look both ways before crossing the street.  This is a good law that was passed in Honolulu.

R/SCG

Friday, October 27, 2017

Addendum to Totally Amazing!!!

Good morning ladies and gentlemen.

The Italian Sports Minister comments that next year's Giro is to honour the memory of Gino Bartoli.

Gino Bartoli is a two-time winner of the Tour de France, once prior to WWII, and once after.  During the war, he ostensibly still trained.  During his training rides, he smuggled false identification papers in the frame of his bicycle.  Those papers helped rescue Italy's Jews from the scourge that had made them a target.

About five years ago, a book entitled "Road to Valour" was published detailing what he did.

Bartoli has a tree in his honour along the Avenue of the Righteous Gentiles at Yad VaShem.

Have I mentioned that I really want to go?

Shabbat Shalom.

R/SCG


Thursday, October 26, 2017

Totally Amazing!!!

Top of the evening everyone.

I do not know if you all know this about me.  I like to ride my bicycle.  In fact, I want to ride my bicycle.  I want to ride my bike.  I want to ride my bicycle.  I want to ride it where I like.

(With thanks to Freddie Mercury and Queen)

Professional cycling has three major races a year.  Most people know about the Tour de France.  One of the other prestigious races is the Vuelta a Espana.  The third one, second in prestige to the Tour and placed last because it is the subject of this blog entry, is the Giro d'Italia.

The Giro is about 100 years old.  As its name suggests, the ride takes place primarily in Italy.  It has begun outside of Italy about 10 times.

In 2018, it is starting outside Europe for the first time.  Stage 1 will be a 10-kilometre time trial around the city of Jerusalem.  Stage 2 will start up in Haifa, head north to Acco, and then come back south to Tel Aviv.  Stage 3 will start in Be'er Sheva and go south to Eilat.  They will then head over to Europe to complete the race.

As the title of this blog entry says, this is totally amazing.

I am thinking about going.

Have a great evening.

R/SCG

Wednesday, October 25, 2017

Serial Serial Comma Removal...

Top of the evening ladies and gentlemen.

There was an article in the National Post on Saturday.  The title of the article was "Bicyclists Are Not Angels".  The author raises several points with which I generally agree.  

Cyclists should be polite.  I agree.  While I firmly believe that cyclists have rights to the road no less than cars, cyclists also have rights to the road no more than cars.  Being polite recognizes those equal rights.

Cyclists should face consequences when breaking the law.  Again, he is right, and that is codified as law in every province and in every state.  I remind everyone though that the selective enforcement of law will lead to the selective observance of law.

I wrote a letter to the editor in response to this article.  In my letter, I pointed out all the wonderful ways bicyclists might do a little better in taking their rightful place on the road.  I also pointed out the ways that cars might do the same.  And because no one is above criticism, it might shock all of you to know that pedestrians are a problem also.

I wrote that drivers/cyclists/pedestrians should be actively visible.  I wrote that they should not be wearing earbuds.  I wrote that they should be predictable.  It applies to everyone.

To pedestrians, I specifically wrote the following:

Entering the crosswalk with six seconds on the countdown is illegal, dangerous, and prevents cars from turning.

They printed my letter as such: 

Entering the crosswalk with six seconds on the countdown is illegal, dangerous and prevents cars from turning.

I put the original text and the editor's change in bold print.

The editor removed my serial comma.  Given that the editor probably makes a habit of this, I am forced to conclude that said editor regularly removes serial commas.  Thus, the editor is a serial remover of the serial comma, leading to the title of this blog entry.

Admittedly, there is some dispute.  When there is a list of three or more items, MLA rules of grammar dictate that there be a comma after each item.  Thus, one would have this, that, and the other thing.  AP rules of grammar state that it is not necessary, yielding this, that and the other thing.  This dispute is long running.  In researching this, I found an article in that venerable news source, The Onion.  The last line of the article states that an innocent 35-year-old passerby who found himself caught up in a long-winded dispute over use of the serial, or Oxford, comma had died of a self-inflicted gunshot wound.

I maintain that the serial comma, sometimes known as the Oxford comma, and sometimes known as the Queen's comma is necessary.  Failure to have it can lead to ambiguity.  For example...

I would like to thank my parents, Burger King, and Dairy Queen.  I have thus thanked three separate elements.  This differs from...

I would like to thank my parents, Burger King and Dairy Queen.  The absence of the comma in this case makes the phrase with Burger King and Dairy Queen an appositive specifically identifying my parents, and further proves that meat and dairy can mix under certain circumstances.

Have a good evening everyone.

R/SCG