Tuesday, July 26, 2016

That Is So Unfair!!

Top of the evening to all...

I often heard my mother say to me that life is unfair.  I learned to accept that.  She is right.  My lament on that is that I do not mind that life is unfair.  Every once in a while, I would like it to be unfair in my favour.  It does not seem like an unreasonable request.

Having said that, I try to make note of when life is unfair in my favour.  Three good things have happened over the last couple of weeks.

I am a member of Cycle Toronto, and have been for eight or nine years.  It is Toronto's cycling union.  During the month of June, there was a drawing for new and renewed memberships.  The winner of the drawing won a bicycle.  It is quite a comfortable ride.  I ended up upgrading it quite a bit, both in terms of speed capability and in terms of basic issues of comfort, so I ended up with about $1000 worth of bicycle for less than half of that amount.  Nice!!

That would have been sufficient.  I then purchased a $3 instant lottery ticket.  It won $100, and then I won another $15 the same day.  My friend David says that playing the lottery is mathematical illiteracy.  He is absolutely right.  Still, yet again, life was unfair in my favour.

Today was the kicker.  One of the local radio stations has a contest three times a day.  If you are the tenth caller, you get to answer increasingly difficult trivia questions.  A correct answer increases the amount of money won.  An incorrect answer loses everything.  You can quit at any time and take your winnings.  I elected to quit after having won $500.

At this time, I would like to note for the record that life has been unfair in my favour.  I do not expect it to continue, though I would not mind.

Have a good evening everyone.


Monday, July 4, 2016

Best Left Unsaid...

Top of the evening to all...

Many times, I have uttered some sort of wisecrack under my breath.  Those who hear something ask what it was.  I usually respond that it is not worth repeating.  Generally speaking, things not worth repeating are usually not worth saying in the first place.  That, however, is a different discussion.  Or maybe it is not.

Here are two things best left unsaid.

You may have heard in the news that a person dressed as Superman stole a truckload of capers (you know....the little brownish things that are used to decorate food plates).  This event will come to be known as the great caped caper caper.

And if you think that is bad...

There was a person holding two pears that he had peeled.  He thus had a pair of pared pears.

Have a good night.


If You Happen to Be in Altoona...

Top of the afternoon to all...

My medium child, bless his soul, is constantly coming home with hubcaps.  I do not know why.  One of my nicknames for him is "Hubcap."  Those who know him will agree that it fits.

Two of the hubcaps that he brought home fit on our car.  This was convenient.  We were missing two hubcaps.  These two hubcaps did not match each other.  They also did not match the two hubcaps that were already on the car.  I put them on anyway.

Yesterday, Jennifer and I were driving northbound on I-99, just north of Altoona, Pennsylvania.  There was something in the road, likely a piece of a blown-out tire.  For reasons that are lost on me, I ran it over instead of steering gently to avoid it.  I heard a clunk.  I saw this thing that had been in the road bouncing a little bit before coming to a rest.

And I saw a hubcap go rolling across the road.

When we got home, lo and behold, we were down a hubcap.  Luckily, the two that still match each other remain on the car.

If you happen to be passing through Altoona, Pennsylvania, and if you happen to see a hubcap on the side of I-99 north of Altoona, I do not expect you to stop and pick it up for us.  I hope that you will have a little chuckle though.

Have a great day everyone.